Digital Cowboy

I promised a friend (and myself) a while back that I would start posting some of my wild stories. I haven’t done it mainly because the inspiration hasn’t hit me. But I’m thinking about it again.

I’ve always thought that my life was boring and mundane. I’m starting to realize that it’s been pretty adventurous and wild. I have stories.

Maybe I’ll tell some of them one of these days.

I’ve hung out with more than a few bands. Got the backstage pass and all that. Chalk it up to a lucky childhood if you must, but I prefer to think that genius attracts genius. I’m no musical genius. Far from it. I’m a marginally good drummer. (I can do really good paradiddles if the situation requires.)

Anyway.

I’ve touched people that should be stars and yet are not, as well as people that are stars for no particular reason. I’ve also encountered many that believe they’re stars and still are not – because they simply ain’t got it.

(If you’re wondering whether I’m talking about you here – why, Yes! I probably am. Your wondering probably proved it!)

Bitterness and broken dreams are always ugly. They fuel an ugly fire.

Let’s have a toast to reality!

But first I’m gonna tell everyone about my wild escapades at the 2005 World Series of Poker!

Wait. I wasn’t even there. See how easy it is to get carried away with a fantasy?

(Anyone left is welcome to join the delusion party. Train leaves… ummm… whenever we decide. Reality’s for the chumps, right? Right?!?!)

You can tell a lot about a person by what they read, what they drive, what they watch on TV, what movies they like… etc.

So what’s on your PVR? Or do you call it a DVR?

If you don’t have one and watch television at all, get one. It’s the finest invention of the 21st century so far. I don’t need or want a camera in my phone. Video games have been plenty good enough for a long time. Ditto for CPU speeds. But the Personal Video Recorder will change your life. You will enjoy TV more, watch more that’s worthwhile and spend far less time doing it.

Anyway, here’s a partial run down of what’s on my PVR right now:

• Multiple episodes of both Bonanza and Gunsmoke – a couple yet to be watched and a few saved for repeat viewings (Thank you TV Land!)
• Mike Tyson’s Greatest Hits II
• The Tyson/Douglas Fight from February 1990 (all other commentary aside, it was a great fight)
• The Petrified Forest, High Sierra and Casablanca – I love Bogey, especially with Bacall. Maybe I’ll be able to snag To Have and Have Not one of these days. (Thank you TCM!)
• Animal Crackers, Monkey Business, Horse Feathers and Duck Soup. (Another thanks to TCM. Not only do they show them, they do it in chronological order.)
• Jesse James: Legend, Outlaw, Terrorist (I’ll save my commentary on the title for another post, but it’s a very good documentary. Thanks to Discovery Channel for that one.)
• Various poker tournaments – WSOP 2005, Poker Superstars Invitational, WPT, etc.

Don’t bother with the smug “I don’t even have a TV” comments. I’m not impressed. In fact, I think it’s rather silly. I don’t watch “mainstream” TV. I’d estimate that I’ve watched a grand total of about 15 minutes of every “reality TV” show, combined. Most sitcoms these days aren’t funny unless your name is Beavis and TV drama has been in a very big drought. But that doesn’t at all mean that TV is a waste of time or that it’s without value. If you’re really proud of not watching TV, you’re probably an idiot that believes you’re really an “intellectual.”

I wouldn’t have wanted to be without Fox News and CNN on September 11, 2001. Likewise, I’ve learned quite a bit, often indirectly, from watching the History Channel, Discovery, TLC, etc.

Also, TV drama seems to have found resuscitation. After over a decade of not watching any network TV drama, I’ve recently gotten hooked on the CSI franchises. I also got hooked very quickly on the new CBS series Criminal Minds. (I was excited about the new series NUMB3RS but it fell flat. It’s a great idea poorly done.)

With that disclaimer out of the way, what’s on your PVR/DVR or your “must see” list?

On the last post, I meant to mention that if you do decide to engage any of these trolls, don’t bother talking to them about love because it’s a foreign concept to them. No need quoting the Bible or biblical concepts, either. The instigator of this attack is a very, very religious “atheist.” I don’t know much about the rest, but they’re his “friends,” so it’s not a leap to assume that they hate God and serve themselves, as well.

They’re not trying to love anyone. They’re living in a dark world where the only god they will openly admit to serving is themselves. Everything I said about them mocking me because they fear me is infinitely more true about their mockery of Jesus Christ.

Surely that makes their hatred much easier to understand. As pathetic as I am in the eyes of my Savior, I’ve never been so pathetic as to ridicule His sacrifice. Yet, the thought of having no one higher than me in charge is the only thing that I will allow to frighten me.

Now imagine living in a world where the idiot in the mirror is all you’ve got. Especially when the idiot in the mirror is grossly incapable and insecure. That’s where the venom comes from.

It’s a world consumed with darkness, fear and hate. That’s one of the reasons some “atheists” tend to evangelize and proselytize for their religion more than Christians do. Misery loves company and many of them, because of their insecurities, need others to affirm their choice of belief for them. That’s also why they have to round up others to attack me in packs.

On the other hand, I don’t hate people. Any of them. I hate the “atheists’” true god and I often hate circumstances and situations, but people were created to be loved.

For those of you concerned about the recent troll flood, don’t be. It’s also not necessary to defend me, though I appreciate it. In fact, it’s best to ignore them. This was an organized effort to harass me and, silly as it is, those pathetic people get great pleasure out of disrupting things here. That’s one reason I’ve been very selective about responding to them. Because they live in fear, they get jollies out of instigating strife. Most of them were people who have never met me and know absolutely nothing about me. They were recruits and this is how they “take care of their friends” – by playing attack dog on command. (Gooooood doggie! Have a treat.)

Secondly, it’s important to recognize that mockery is born out of fear. They mock me and hate me because they fear me. Self-confidence in another is horribly disconcerting to those who live in massive insecurity. And, because they are always seeking approval, it is impossible for them to understand that their words mean nothing to me. There are few people whose opinions I value. It’s for sure none of those trolls or the people that stirred them up are among them.

None of you know anything but the high-level overview about my divorce. That’s by design. You would be shocked and appalled at the stories I could tell you and the evidence I have to back them up. I would love to share all of the details with you but I have far more grace and decorum than my enemies do. That’s the part that so fascinates me about them – they know I could horribly humiliate them if I so chose. Yet, I’ve been going out of my way not to do that to them for three years, all while they’ve done everything they can to humiliate me. Three years later, they’re still “poking the bear with the stick.”

I’m even using some intentional vagueness here to attempt to conceal them yet the primary one “called me out” and posted a comment (anonymously, of course) a few days ago something like “Who’s posting under fake names and hiding? Huh? If you have names, name ‘em!” The commenter then went on to mock me as a coward if I wouldn’t name names.

I didn’t respond, but thought to myself, “Who would protect you from me if I didn’t? I could post your name, your current and last three home addresses, your current and last three home phone numbers, your email addresses, your web site address, your mother’s home address, embarrassing stories about you with pictures and videos to prove them and, with just a slight bit of effort, probably your employer’s address and phone number. And that’s just off the top of my head.” (Of course, they then accuse me of “stalking” them, when in fact, they dropped most of that info in my lap. I have better things to do than hunt losers for sport.)

That’s not the kind of man I am. They know that’s not the kind of man I am. That’s how they know they can get away with continuing to poke the bear.

I’ve heard meekness defined as strength in reserve. I know I’m the last person you would associate with the word “meek.” But the fact is, I have the upper hand in this playground game they like so much and I always have. I feel no need to use it.

They’ll always fail and that’s one reason there’s not even a need for me to respond in kind. Another is that I recognize that they do it out of fear and massive insecurity. I chuckle at their comments and feel very sorry for them. Pity is ugly, but it’s sometimes all that’s available.

On a semi-related note, I’m really not sure why everyone, friends and enemies alike, thinks I’m so angry. I vent my frustrations here, sure. But I’m not an angry person. My life has been very frustrating for 3 years. I vent, pray and move on. God handles it from there.

One last thing: I was fascinated that even after I did the Masters of Projection, You’re not as anonymous as you think and If you wanna hurt me… posts, they continued to try to hurt me, anonymously, with angry tirades about how angry I am. Some went so far as to say that I need to “get a life” while sitting at their computers on Friday and Saturday nights hitting refresh on my blog to see if anyone had taken their bait yet.

Now that’s funny. I don’t care who ya are!