Roll your own?
August 24th, 2005One of my vices is that I love a good smoke. I smoke Lucky Strikes most of the time now, but I started many years ago with good cigars. It didn’t take me long to realize that it was a rich man’s habit and I was not yet a rich man. The cigars I preferred were generally in the 5-8 dollar range which meant, at that time, I could get about 60 Luckys – enough to last me more than a week – for the price of one Davidoff Mouton Cadet No. 5, which would last me about 45 minutes to an hour. In addition, I could buy the 60 Luckys and throw 40 on the kitchen counter until I needed them while carrying the other 20 with me. The cigar, on the other hand, I had to buy individually on or about the day I intended to smoke it because I didn’t have $200+ to lay out for even a cheap humidor.
As an aside, few things turn me on like a well dressed woman smoking a cigar. At the same stompin’ ground I mentioned in the stinky post, I befriended a very classy older woman that was a very high level executive for a multi-national corporation. One night the subject of cigars came up and she informed that she had just come back from a business trip and had half a box of very good cigars left over from entertaining clients. I said I would love one some time. She informed me they were outside in the trunk of her car and, since she had no humidor, they were going to go to waste. Minutes later she returned with one, pulled the label off, tucked it in my shirt pocket and lit the cigar. We shared it and it was one of the best cigars I’d ever had.
The next day I discovered the label in my shirt pocket and examined it. I wasn’t familiar with the brand, so I kept the label and showed it to my tobacconist the next time I went for a Davidoff. I told him the story and explained that I didn’t know this brand, but really liked it. I asked him if he carried them. He said he could special order them for me but only by the box because they cost… … nearly $1000 dollars a box. If he sold them individually, he would have to sell them for around $95 a piece. It seems they’re soaked in fine brandy and then aged for 60 years.
But back to the subject at hand. Thanks to the Clinton administration, smoking Luckys is now almost as expensive as the cigars I prefer while at the moment I’m less financially fluid than I was in those good old days.
So I got a crazy idea today. While out running some errands, I decided to pick up some smokes. The store where I stopped didn’t carry any cigarettes without a filter except Camels. (I won’t smoke a filtered cigarette. It’s like smoking cotton.) I’ve tried Camels a time or two in the past and decided I’ll never be that desperate for a smoke. And then… right there in front of me was everything I needed to roll my own cigarettes for less than half of the cost of a pack of Luckys.
My grandfather rolled his own cigarettes for many years and I watched him do it dozens, if not hundreds, of times. Perfect! Premium tobacco, a challenge and a whole lot less of my money going to the government. What could be better?
My grandfather made it look so easy. It’s not. In fact, my grandfather often used to roll his with one hand, standing up with no table or working surface other than his other hand. He even did it one time on my palm while he was driving. Every one I ever saw him roll looked perfect – just like a manufactured cigarette. Mine? Not so much.
I guess it must have taken him years of practice to do it so well and make it look so easy. I’ve rolled two so far, if you can call what I did “rolling a cigarette.” The first was a disaster; a complete loss. I hit the internet, quickly found some very good instructions on how to do it and tried again. I was actually able to smoke most of the second one, but it didn’t really look like a cigarette when I lit it and things sort of went down hill from there.
The sites where I found instructions all say it takes practice. Indeed.
A close friend of mine ‘rolls her own’. She’s not good at doing it by hand, but I noticed that she had bought some little gadget that does it for her.
I looked at both rolling machines and packing machines online while trying to figure out how to do it by hand. They’re not expensive and I may have to give them further consideration.
Still, there’s a “coolness” factor with doing it well by hand. It’s kind of like doing chip tricks at a poker table – it’s of no productive value, but it’s cool.
Smoking may not be evil, but it is disgusting.
I searched for “Tobacco seeds” on the internet a while back and was suprised that they’re actually available. I always just assumed that tobacco seeds were so tightly regulated by our awesome and caring government that they weren’t available.
I’m trying to quit, but I might grow some just for barter when society falls apart.
Anyhow, if you want to go even cheaper, that’s a route.
Smoking won’t send you to hell but you’ll smell like you got close. On the other hand, since I quit when I was 17, there are days when I’ll catch a whiff of smoke and have a wild craving.
it took me almost seven years to learn how to roll the perfect cig. Zig-zag makes a nice little rolling machine that is easy to use and may cost you about seven bucks. maybe not even that much. don’t use ‘em myself.
good luck rollin’.
Repent! Verily, verily I say unto you when Richard posteth a comment surely the coming of the Son of Man is at hand.
DC, you crack me up!!!
I can see the appeal of the female putting a cigar in her mouth. But actually smoking it? Ugh… Do you want a woman who smells like that? Smells like somethin’ died in Mexico and got sent to the U.S. without refrigeration…
I quit smoking a month ago. But, I’ve always loved a good cigar. Nothing wrong with that.
I’ve rolled my own off and on for about 22 years, only not with tobacco, you understand? (I quite that a while back, so nobody yell at me) Same principal, just gotta keep those thumbs in.
Elena, it’s not a phallic effect about it that turns me on. It’s more a non-conformist vibe. Smoke rings coming from beautiful red lips is very sexy, too. And a good cigar is better than a good perfume. It certainly does not leave a foul odor. Now, cheap cigars… that’s different. I get nauseous if I get within 5 feet of one, even if it’s unlit.
Billy, you’ll get no condemnation from me whether you quit or not. I don’t smoke wacky tobaccy but only because I don’t care for it. I have a number of friends and neighbors that do and I have no problem with it.
All things in moderation, brother.
Well, I may imbibe on occasion in the future, I’ll not swear I won’t. No cigarettes though. One to two packs a day for 21 years.
Smoke rings from ruby red lips…
All I can picture now is a woman, feet up on a desk, cowgirl boots and hat, mini-skirt just covering the naughty bits, leaning back in a leather chair, puffing away…
I gotta hit a smoke shop on the way home.
lol, I also was the same with regards to cigars (I’m not a smoker). The good ones were expensive and somehow spending $5-$10 on a good one started to grate on my nerve. I might as well just get smoking tobacco and roll it up in a $10 bill.
I saw this joke pic this morning and immediately thought of your post on rolling your own.
http://snipurl.com/hbuw
That’s awesome, Morris! First good chuckle I’ve had tonight.