Digital Cowboy

… and it’s all so depressing.

I don’t mean that it’s depressing that she was right. I would expect she usually is. She’s very smart and smart people tend to be right a lot.

But I heard through the gossip tree (closely related to the grapevine) that she was complaining about my blog becoming “all poker all the time” right after I did the Just a warning post a few weeks ago. (That’s not even what I said. But I understand that after it had passed through a hundred people or so, by the time the little bird told me, it was probably slightly distorted. It wouldn’t be the first time that stupid bird mislead me.)

Anyway. Seems she was right. I did a little scrolling on my own blog page a few minutes ago and noticed that everyone here is, at best, completely disinterested in poker. The header on every page here says, “Poker is life, life is poker.” right under my big, fancy name! Yet when I discuss poker my comments are a big fat zero.

I love y’all that read and comment around here. But don’t any of ya care about poker at all?!?!

That’s my stand.

Their marketing company is worse. Whores working for whores.

Their latest annoying commercial ends with the guy looking right at me (Yes! Right at ME!) and saying, “Can you love your car insurance as much as you love your car? Yes. That’s Allstate’s stand.”

Insurance is a sucker play to start with. Cars are shiny and they sound cool and they go fast. Cars are sexy. Insurance is stupid.

Insurance is making a monthly bet that something horrible is going to happen to you. You’re making the bet with someone who has an army of math geeks they call “actuaries” that are paid (and quite well) to calculate the odds and make sure they’re charging you enough to put the odds firmly in their favor. It’s a fixed game, boys and girls. If the odds were even, they would refuse the “service” to you.

Speaking of “service,” the insurance industry is the only one I know that will charge you every month for a service that if they are ever required to actually perform for you, punishes you with higher rates or cancellation. Because you asked them to do what you paid them for.

What a racket. They sell risk protection while refusing to take any risk. The mafia never could’ve dreamed up anything so pretty.

“Pay me protection money every munt. I can’t actually protect you from nuttin’, but I promise if anything bad happens to you, I’ll give you some of your money back (after you fill out da requisite forms and go through da whole rigamarole) and then I’ll refuse to sell you protection after that. Or I’ll just make it real expensive for ya, ’cause, I mean, c’mon, you’re a big risk to me now. I ain’t in the risk business. Wait. Well. You know what I mean.”

It’s an entire multi-billion dollar industry built on nothing more than preying on other people’s fears. It’s downright evil.

I called ‘em whores at the beginning of this post. That’s really rather unfair to whores. They provide the service they’re paid for and usually without complaining.

I catch crap all the time for referring to my wife as my wife.

Neighbors, friends, family. None of them get it. Apparently they all think I should call her my “ex.”

But she’s not.

Society and the courts may spit on the idea of commitment, but I won’t. The terminology is not a major issue with me. I really don’t give it much thought until someone gets uncomfortable and tries to “remind” me that she’s my “ex-wife.” I call her my wife because she is and always will be. The divorce was simply a legal matter. The marriage was a life commitment. I didn’t ask for the government’s approval when we created the marriage and government has no authority to destroy it. I don’t take back promises, even if I’m begged. (Ask my wife, she’ll tell you how much it torments her. She spent 60,000 of her parents dollars trying. And lost.)

I’ll always be there for her. In sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, blah, blah, freakin’ blah. Despite all her shortcomings, I love her unconditionally. I gave her my life. I gave it to her.

That’s a forever thing. So she took advantage and flushed that gift. That doesn’t make it available to me to take back.

And it’s not emotions or denial or refusing to move on. PLEASE stop with that crap. I’m a man and I made a life commitment. It can’t be undone and it’s for damn sure no one dressed up in a black robe can change it.

Will I ever get married again? Nope. I AM married. Will I ever have a girlfriend? Nope. I’m married.

Stop trying to fix me up, stop telling me to “move on” and stop trying to change me.

I’m Mark and I’m a married man with two little girls that need a stable Daddy. They also need to see someone in their lives keep a promise. They don’t need another step-parent.

Three lessons I’ve learned in life:

1) The Lord loves a workin’ man
2) Don’t trust whitey
3) It’s out there but if ya see the doctor, he can get rid of it

They’s a lot wisdom in there. Don’t thank me, I’m just passin’ it on.