My grandmother
February 27th, 2005My father’s mother was an amazing woman. I knew her but I regret I didn’t know her more.
She grew up in the city and her husband was a farmer. When they married, she was 33 years old. In those days that was a spinster. His family so abhorred the idea that he would marry a “city girl” that they refused to attend the wedding. They told him (and her) that she would “never make it on a farm.” So, on wedding day, the bride’s side of the church was packed and the groom’s side of the church was empty. That broke her heart. But she was determined to prove them wrong.
She married at 33 and then had 8 children in 11 years. This was in the 1940′s and it was a rural, farm life. Every morning she was up before the sun to fetch in many pails of water from the well pump outside. Water for laundry, cooking and cleaning for the entire day. And she wasn’t just feeding her hoard of ten. This was a working farm with hired hands that showed up for work before dawn. She fed them breakfast, lunch and, on slaughter days or other long ones, dinner too.
I had far too little contact with her, but I never saw her without a smile.
Her husband died long before she did. She ran the family’s farming business for years after he was gone.
My favorite aunt (in a big family) was there when Grandma passed on. Grandma was well into her eighties and had been running the farm on her own for more than a decade. My Aunt Celia told me that her last words were, “Do you think I’ve proved to them that I can make it on a farm?”
When she died, she had thirty-five grandchildren and a number of great grandchildren. Because my father was her only child to precede her in death, my sister and I split his eighth of the inheritance. That little bit of money is long gone. But my real inheritance from her is her life and the lessons to be learned there. I’m still working on it.
DC,
She sure sounds like a real Proverbs 31 woman. I would have loved to have known her, too. Women like her have so much wisdom to share with the younger generations. I actually am somewhat like her. I grew up in suburbia and for my first marriage I married a Nebraska country boy. I learned to garden and can and freeze food from his mother and in those years had chickens and a large garden. It was a good life. In some ways I am trying to recapture some of that now after having lived in the city in Florida for over 13 years. It is a much better life for children, I can tell you. It sounds like she was really organized which is something that is only coming together for me at almost 50. If I was working outside my house would be a disaster. But as I look back on those years, I really am amazed now at all that I did get done. I was criticized so much during that time that I felt like a failure most of the time. I am glad that Father brought me through that and this place in my life has so much shalom, even when life gets really crazy (most of the time anyway, I still do freak out occasionally.)
I would recommend that you tell your daughters stories of your grandmother if you aren’t already. Women like her are the heroines we need to give our daughters – women who loved their homes and families and knew that it was the greatest work in the world. They also have a precious legacy in their grandmother.
Love and shalom,
Serena
I’ve always wished I knew my paternal grandfather better. Thanks for sharing this story with us, DC.
Another reason our civilization has come farther in 230 years than others have in thousands, we have better Grandmas! Thank you for this story.
Your grandmother lived a great story. You come from great stock. There is so much to be learned from people like your grandmother. This is a post to chew on and digest.
Dumpster Juice,
I agree one hundred percent. The American spirit is something else!